Trauma Cat - Nostradamus Lyrics

Hither, my friend
Come, take a seat
I’ve uncovered a lot in just one week
Before you dismiss it and disagree
Won’t you entertain my POV?
Nostradamus was dyslexic
Yes, he got the numbers wrong
Dribbling wine all on his manuscript called “2021”
I have never once neglected to load up my theory gun
And fire at will on everyone
I’m history’s favorite son
Do you ever think we’re on TV?
They heighten our stakes in time for sweeps
As locusts devour the Middle East
We execute actors in the streets
Nostradamus had a bum foot
That he dragged all over town
More failed poet than occultist
A crippled birthday party clown
I will never stop my research
Lest they need me in D.C.
‘Cause I’m the chosen one
I’m history’s favorite
In the witching hour
Just a hair past 3 AM
I outstretch an arm and fumble for the nightstand
Where one man grabs a Bible
I reach for my trusty phone
And ask it kindly to confirm there’s no such thing as the unknown
Nostradamus was dyslexic
Yes, he got the numbers wrong
Dribbling wine all on his manuscript called “2021”
I have never once neglected to load up my theory gun
And fire at will on everyone
I’m history’s favorite son

Hither, my friend
Come, take a seat
I’ve uncovered a lot in just one week
Before you dismiss it and disagree
Won’t you entertain my POV?
Nostradamus was dyslexic
Yes, he got the numbers wrong
Dribbling wine all on his manuscript called “2021”
I have never once neglected to load up my theory gun
And fire at will on everyone
I’m history’s favorite son
Do you ever think we’re on TV?
They heighten our stakes in time for sweeps
As locusts devour the Middle East
We execute actors in the streets
Nostradamus had a bum foot
That he dragged all over town
More failed poet than occultist
A crippled birthday party clown
I will never stop my research
Lest they need me in D.C.
‘Cause I’m the chosen one
I’m history’s favorite
In the witching hour
Just a hair past 3 AM
I outstretch an arm and fumble for the nightstand
Where one man grabs a Bible
I reach for my trusty phone
And ask it kindly to confirm there’s no such thing as the unknown
Nostradamus was dyslexic
Yes, he got the numbers wrong
Dribbling wine all on his manuscript called “2021”
I have never once neglected to load up my theory gun
And fire at will on everyone
I’m history’s favorite son