Steel Panther - I Ain't Buying What You're Selling Lyrics

I Ainʼt Buying What Youʼre Selling
I donʼt need a crystal ball
to tell me that Iʼll be
dead from liver failure
just wait around and see
Donʼt need acupuncture
To rid me of my pain
I got pharmaceuticals
And no plans to abstain
Cuz I ainʼt buying
I ainʼt buying
What youʼre selling
I donʼt need confession
To absolve me of my sins
Theyʼre as much a part of me
As a fish is to his fins
I donʼt need the government
Or a social safety net
That ponzi scheme will crash someday
If it hasnʼt started yet
And I ainʼt buying
I Ainʼt buying
What youʼre selling
If I come across
As if I am complaining
Itʼs cuz youʼre pissing down my back
And youʼre telling me itʼs raining
Maybe you believe the bullshit
Or maybe youʼre just lying
But I ainʼt buying
I donʼt need conspiracies
Or ufology
To distract me from my happy life
Of mediocrity
Iʼve got a labradoodle
And Iʼve got the gift of song
And when thatʼs not enough
I take a ripper off my bong
And I ainʼt buying
I ainʼt buying
What youʼre selling

I Ainʼt Buying What Youʼre Selling
I donʼt need a crystal ball
to tell me that Iʼll be
dead from liver failure
just wait around and see
Donʼt need acupuncture
To rid me of my pain
I got pharmaceuticals
And no plans to abstain
Cuz I ainʼt buying
I ainʼt buying
What youʼre selling
I donʼt need confession
To absolve me of my sins
Theyʼre as much a part of me
As a fish is to his fins
I donʼt need the government
Or a social safety net
That ponzi scheme will crash someday
If it hasnʼt started yet
And I ainʼt buying
I Ainʼt buying
What youʼre selling
If I come across
As if I am complaining
Itʼs cuz youʼre pissing down my back
And youʼre telling me itʼs raining
Maybe you believe the bullshit
Or maybe youʼre just lying
But I ainʼt buying
I donʼt need conspiracies
Or ufology
To distract me from my happy life
Of mediocrity
Iʼve got a labradoodle
And Iʼve got the gift of song
And when thatʼs not enough
I take a ripper off my bong
And I ainʼt buying
I ainʼt buying
What youʼre selling