Rodney Dangerfield - Rappin' Rodney Lyrics

I tell ya I'm alright now
But last week I was in rough shape
But I don't get a break with nuthin'

I played hide and seek when I was three
(No respect, no respect)
Why they couldn't even look for me
(No respect, no respect)
I was an ugly kid I never had fun
(No respect, no respect)
They put me through a dog show and I won!
(No respect, no respect)
When I was born I brought no joy
(No respect, no respect)
My old man said he wanted a boy
(No respect, no respect)
I was an ugly kid always alone
(No respect, no respect)
Halloween I had to trick or treat over the phone
(No respect, no respect)
Friends don't call
My phone don't ring
I don't get a break with anything!
(Whatsamatta rodney?)
Ah death, where is my sting?!

It's just Rappin' Rodney
Ain't that your type
No, no
Rappin' Rodney
Get out of sight
It's just
Rappin' Rodney
Make no mistake
Or old
Rappin' Rodney
Can't get a break!

I'm getting old it's hard to face
(No respect, no respect)
Well during sex I lose my place
(No respect, no respect)
Steak and sex my favorite pair
(No respect, no respect)
I have 'em both the same way...very rare
(No respect, no respect)
I know I'm old I could go any minute
(No respect, no respect)
I got a kidney shaped pool with a stone in it
(No respect, no respect)
Doctor Vinnie Boombah that's another one
(No respect, no respect)
I said I wanted to stop aging he gave me a gun
(No respect, no respect)
I told him I got water on the knee
He gave me a sponge and raised his fee
(Whatsamatter rodney?)
Ahhhh, It ain't easy bein' me

Ah, give me a break
Play somethin' from the forties

Now what kind of music is this?
And how 'bout stardust?

Hey what are you doin'?
That's not stardust!

Listen to this will ya?!
I mean where are the flutes?

What a band...
Hey, don't quit your day jobs!

Look at this!
The drummer carries the melody

Hey tell the bass player
I like his instrument

Hey boys, keep it goin'
Lay it on me
I'm in the groove!

Nothin' goes right I just can't fight it
(No respect, no respect)
Well Eastern Airlines thanked me for flying United
(No respect, no respect)
I got some money what did I do?
(No respect, no respect)
I bought some quicksand the deal fell through
(No respect, no respect)
My car broke down I called Triple A
(No respect, no respect)
They left the car and towed me away
(No respect, no respect)
I can't take it no more I'm getting too old
(No respect, no respect)
I called suicide prevention they put me on hold
(No respect, no respect)
Winter, Summer, Spring, and Fall
I'm always up against the wall
(Whatsamatta rodney?)
Ahhh, I don't get no respect at all

It's getting worse
It's caving in
The happiness I can't take it no more
It's all over
Hey, where are my kids?
Somebody help me
Hey bartender!
Hey! Who's that guy with my daughter?
Where's my wallet?
How do I get out of here?
Stop that dancin'!