Kaybeo - lost soul overthinking Lyrics

Time will show won't it?
But time will show won't it?
I'm still struggling with finding love and I don't know if I will-
Mhm
I take it raw, one, two
One take

I wish that it was easy to express the way feel
'Cause I don't want to live a lonely life and be concealed
And I know that type of lifestyle will never be ideal
But what the fuck i'm 'posed to do when I will never be unsealed
But time will show, won't it?
I'm still struggling with finding love
And I don't know if I will do in 2021
'Cause everytime I seem to like someone and want to ask
I always overthink and never do it, never fast
Blame it on my stupid ass and cry about it in my bed
Talking with that crush I have, but never seem to take a step
All my life has been like this, but will it ever change?
Still the same old loser with the same old ways
Must say i'm strange, give myself a challenge
But I never seem to manage, 'cause I always find a shortcut
Tend to run away instead of risking luck
Life's a bitch when I never seem to give a fuck
Life's a bitch when I never seem to give a fuck
Yeah

Overthinking is a normal habit I have made
I fucking it hate it, but it's been with me since I was eight
With my legos and playmobiles, playing games
Unsure about my moves and how I should've played
And next year i'll turn 18, the clocks ticking
I gotta' fix my shit and dunk it like i'm Scottie Pippen
And tell the one I fell in love with that she got me thinking
But what if she don't feel the same and tell me that i'm tripping
Yeah i've done this shit before, but shit ended badly
'Cause all the people that accept me end up acting nasty
And stick a knife inside my heart like it's a damn finale
Making me wear a fucking mask like I was fucking Sally
That's how it ends sadly, that's how it always been
But who knows what will happen in the end
'Cause everything tends to change in this world according to my friends
Sorry, i'm just overthinking bad again
Fuck

Go, go, go
No
Please?
What am I supposed to say?
I don't know, just something that comes from the heart
Don-
Don't say fuck you
Don are you recording me now?
I know! You're supposed to say something nice
No, I don't want to
Why?

Should I write another verse?
To be honest, think i'm losing it
Scared of people leaving in an instant with no sign of it
Fuck, that's a bad rhyme, shit, let me scrap it
And then throw it in my trash can and never look back at it
What's happening, sun shining and i'm sitting inside
Making songs that'll make my mom and dad be terrfied of my mental
Breathing in and out while at the dental
Almost start to panic when they say they lack parental check up
'Cause i'm the only one showing up to the damn appointments
They be checking out for days though I find it pointless
'Cause I don't find it easy anymore to start a convo
They call me social, but i'm only social when they follow
On my phone playing games I never ever play
Fiddling with everything around me tryna find a way
To leave my depressive state
And stop thinking over and over again without connecting my paper and pen

I remember back in 2020, met this chick and i fell in love
Then we started snapping and talking about the days to come
I started to feel some shit i've never ever felt before
Knew I had to ask her, but i'm such a bore
What if she don't like me like I like her and then sees me as a friend
And nothing more than just another stupid fucker tryna blend
With all the others on her phone, that are desperate like myself
Trying to get her in my life, but i need some fucking help
'Cause I can't tell her what I feel, just in case she do not like me
Or feel the same way and do not want to be my wifey in the future
Jesus fucking christ i'm such a loser
She a ten and i'm a zero, we can never be together
And this pain will last forever, what the fuck i'm 'posed to do?
I'm just a stupid fucking sellout, never going out my room
So instead of being forward and asking her wanna date
She my friend and I don't think that she will ever wanna date
Fuck

No
Please?
Why are you recording me now?
*laughs*
Please say something
No, cause you're recording, I won't tell you
I know
Stop
Go, go ,go
No
Please?
What am I supposed to say?
I don't know, just something that comes from the heart
Don-
Don't say fuck you
Don are you recording me now?
I know! You're supposed to say something nice
No, I don't want to
(Feel)
Why?
I don't want to
You don't want to?
No
Why?
It goes like mhm, I don't know
Do it again, do it again
Ah, fuck!
Hold on, hold on