Jeff Foxworthy - Totally Committed Lyrics

Hi, I'm Jeff Foxworthy and I have got
A wonderful woman that I am totally committed to
Always figured if something was worth doing it was worth doing right
You ever see those dead possum lying in the road
They were partially committed

Rule number one, if she ain't happy, you ain't happy
And if she ain't happy long enough
You're gon' be unhappy with half your stuff
Early on in our marriage when we'd be
In the same room for a half hour and she wouldn't say
A word to me, I would make the mistake
Of lookin' at her and goin', "What's wrong?"
Hopin' it was something other than me

Now I have learned, if we're in the same room
For a half hour and she doesn't say a word to me, it's me
Now, I just go up to her and go, "Baby, I realize
I have done or said somethin' stupid and insensitive
And while I don't yet know what it is I would like a chance
To go up to my room and think about it for a little while"

This games been played for centurys
Ever since Adam fell for Eve
The sooner you'll learn, the better off you'll be
Just like me, totally committed

I've learned early on in our relationship
That women are complicated creatures and
Once I accepted that, it made things a lot easier for me
But I have found that because women are complicated
They like to think men are complicated too
You ever hear a group of women talkin' to each other
"Ooh, I wish I knew what he was really thinkin'"

Ladies, I will tell you what we're really thinkin'
We're really thinkin', "I'd like a beer and I'd like to see
Somethin' naked", that's all we're thinkin'
You go to a nursing home and see a ninety year old man
Goin' down the hall on a walker, that's what he's thinkin'
"I'd like a beer and well, I'd like to see somethin' naked"

This game's been played for centurys
Ooh, not that, not that
The sooner you'll learn, the better off you'll be
Just like me, totally committed

And I do believe women understand men
Better than men understand women, don't you?
Think about that, how often do you see a man
Stomp out of a room cryin' and a woman goin'
"What, what'd I say, come back"

And I do think men would take advice about relationships
But we're not gon' sit down and read magazines about it
You got to feed it to us in a way where we'd accept it
Sneak it into the play-by-play of a baseball game

And there's strike three Greg Maddux lookin'
Really good today and speakin' of lookin' good
Fellas, from time to time, your woman
Needs to be reminded that she's still lookin' good to you
Hey baby, have I told you lately you are as pretty as Greg Maddux?

This game's been played for centurys
Baby, where ya goin?
Ever since Adam fell for Eve
The sooner you'll learn, the better off you'll be
Just like me
I keep tellin' you, I am totally committed

Now repeat after me, totally committed
Now, baby, what I meant to say is when you're naked
You're prettier than Greg Maddux
You really are, I'm goin' up to my room