It feels so good
Oh that's my shit right there
That's the ticket
Give me the ticket
Give it to me, baby
I'm too emotional
Good luck to my future wives
And their future lives without me
You guys will do great!
I'm sure that I've prepared you for every guy you'll date
And every guy you'll marry
And every guy you'll hate
It's the lullabies I sang out of tune
That's probably what did it
Or my twin size mattress that I had since I was seven
That we have to sleep on whenever she spends the night
And if she falls off again, she'll find another guy to like
We're just Romeo & Juliet
But getting drunk and eating Percocets
But just to ease the stress
But soft what light, through yonder window breaks
It is the east, but Juliet just puked off the balcony
How romantic
Nothing like getting drunk and getting manic
On a motherfucking Monday, I
I brush the bangs behind her lovely little ear
As she describes in detail how the end is truly near
Wow, and I'm sure that we can do this for forever
Or until we drink the poison, 'cause she sees some cloudy weather
As Rosaline, lies in bed, seething, wide awake
Because a burning love for Juliet only took a day
And if Romeo and Juliet continued to be married
Then there's half of a chance
That their kids would get embarrassed
When all the kids at school all talk about their parents
And Romeo Jr. has to say they're not together
And Junior will dream of the day when he's a man
And what he'll do to avoid that fifty percent chance
Of his kids feeling the way he feels
He'll probably just stick with the Netflix and chill
Dear Shakespeare
Could you write a happy ending please?
Could you write a happy ending please?
We just deserve a happy ending please, please
And every sting from every teardrop
From every ring at every pawn shop
I'm not missing both my Christmas'
Though family would be nice
In my dreams, my kids are happy
And I know that they won't mind
One Christmas
Just one Christmas
Just one Christmas
Just one Christmas
But dear mom
Conversations from a couch haven't ever felt the same
Since you looked Dad in the eye
And you told him that things are about to change
My mom was made from Adam's rib
And the marriage went south
When the snake came back and asked my mother out to dinner
And my dad found out, and asked my mom what that's about
And she said "Oh, it's nothing"
For dad loves to shout really loud
Loud enough to knock the lamps and dressers to the ground
In my memory, I can hear
Chopin's nocturnes playing in the background
A slow trainwreck, you'll close your eyes
But forever hear the sound, and boy, it's tough
'Cause that's the sound of people falling out of love
