Paid in Amerikkka, Kay Dené, Jean Doe - Heavy Hearted Lyrics

I be guarded heavy hearted dear departed
Some days I just miss my grandfather cancer got em
Took him to the other side nicotine a problem
Gave my money for some cigarettes but I never bought em
Now he calling but I ignore em
Cuz i ain't got the heart to tell him that I can't do it
But old habits never die I'm guessing now I knew it
Ain't pick up for a whole week I know he going through it
Got a call from my mama and she tell me that my paw paw gone
I never thought I'd put these words in a brand new song
For the flesh of my flesh baby blood of my bone
But I once heard Pac say that life goes on
Walked into to my grandma house saw him laying on the couch
Everybody in there quiet I can't open up my mouth
I'm at real loss for words ain't nun coming out
I'm sittin staring at the man that showed me what it's all about
White sheet on his face and forever sleeping
Fuck the grim reaper got my grandma weeping
White sheet on his face he forever sleeping
Fuck the grim reaper got my grandma weeping
And I'm heated
The thought alone bout to drive me insane
What a day
I swear I ain't got a reason to pray
Man I'm tripping and I'm faded
And I'm feeling rather jaded
On some other shit lately
Fuck the world it's complicated
Swear I love it and I hate it
Ain't no drifting or escaping
Stand up tall ya gotta face it
I might fall but I ain't breaking
I ain't nothin like a vase is
Never shiver never shaking
Every morning that I wake up
Thank the lord that I made it

Even tho your gone
You will not be forgotten
You will not be forgotten
They can't stop me from plotting
Holding on
Shits been going wrong
I know this whole world is rotten
Know this whole world is rotten
They can't stop me from plotting
Going on

Sharp pain in my gut got me stuck what the fuck
Like I ain't even got a dolla to my name
Not a buck
Outta luck and outta time
So why a nigga gotta rush
Tomorrow never been a promise and that's something you can trust
They shoot us with our hands up
Supposed to protect but they corrupt
So it's fuck the police at every show
Ain't no love
And they'll probably gun me down for giving y'all truth uncut
But I'll gladly die for ya cause it mean that much
I watch Malcolm and I cry every time that he die
They say it was Farrakhan order and I doubt that they lie
Probably the alphabet boys yea the FBI
You know they hate to see a nigga giving word on the rise
Saw things I shouldn't see and now it's blood eyes
Thirst for knowledge and understanding that's a word from the wise
Keep ya ears and eyes peeled for them snakes in disguise
Catch you on the other side til then I'll be in the sky
You never know the worth of water til the well go dry
So live ya life just like you love it or it might slip by
Hug ya father kiss ya mother let me know how much you love me
Once it's done then it's over
Ain't no coming back from under
Chasing money stay in trouble
Man I promise it ain't nothing
For that judge to hand a whole hundred years to yo black ass
That fast it's that bad
The cycle is a circle and yo kid left with no dad

Even tho your gone
You will not be forgotten
You will not be forgotten
They can't stop me from plotting
Holding on
Shits been going wrong
I know this whole world is rotten
Know this whole world is rotten
They can't stop me from plotting
Going on

Hard to have faith cause I'm still hurting
Can't let down my burden so I'll cry
Hard to have faith cause I'm still hurting
Can't let go of my burden so I'll cry
I can't let go so I'll cry
Cry cry cry
So I'll cry
I cry myself to sleep at night
I just cry I cry I cry