Lucidity - Unloveable Lyrics

Shit is hard, so I don't wanna begin again
Can't explain it, what I'm feelin', so I play pretend
I'ma be the same forever, watch it go again
This is how it end
Lately I've been sleepin' in
Shit is hard, so I don't wanna begin again
Can't explain it, what I'm feelin', so I play pretend
I'ma be the same forever, watch it go again
This is how it end
Now I been alone
Killin' every motherfuckin' hoe that's on my phone
Tryna drop 'em, being cold, but it's all a low
Get to know me, you be running, but I get it though
I'm unloveable, yeah
Been this way for a couple of days
That what I tell 'em, if I'm honest they be thinkin' that I'm strange
If I let 'em know it's years, stuck and on the same page
If I let 'em know it's tears, never sun only rain
I'm obsessin' on my last ones, thinkin' bout cuttin'
I'm thinkin' that I be nothin', I'm thinkin' 'bout poppin' somethin'
I'm thinkin' 'bout on the summit, I'm thinkin' 'bout I be jumpin'
I'm thinkin' 'bout all the people who watchin', all of 'em judgin'
I'm always thinking, never stops, up and down like it's stocks
And if you bettin' it's a loss, like you been gettin' robbed
I'm lookin' up at my idols, decided I'll never be one
Why am I such an outsider, just fuckin' give me a reason
Just fuckin' help me, these demons, they always eat me alive
And everytime that she leavin' she never told me goodbye
She left me scared of myself, don't think that she meant it well
I wish I told her how I'm feelin', that I'm goin' through hell, yeah
Wanna change, but this shit is too late
I wanna tell ya' that I love ya', but still you thinkin' I'm fake
But now I find myself runnin', just so I can get away
So I can go and be shut in and waste away all my days
Lately I've been sleepin' in
Shit is hard, so I don't wanna begin again
Can't explain it, what I'm feelin', so I play pretend
I'ma be the same forever, watch it go again
This is how it end
Now I been alone
Killin' every motherfuckin' hoe that's on my phone
Tryna drop 'em, being cold, but it's all a low
Get to know me, you be running, but I get it though
I'm unloveable, yeah
Wish I was different, but I keep on with this mask
Lotta' shit I should've said, but now I'm caught up on my past
I don't got a lot of friends, but I got a lotta' cash
I'm not thinkin' bout the end, I don't wanna get attached, damn
I'm disconnected - I don't got the time for me
Every day I learn a lesson 'bout the man that I should be
But I never can address it, even though it set me free
So I go down this direction and I'm droppin' what I need
Pick the pleasure every time and I'll admit it that I'm weak
You can measure me insid, and maybe then you'd really see
That I'm twisted and broken, this shit is hopeless for me
And while you pickin' up smokin' I'm tryin' hard just to breathe, yuh

Shit is hard, so I don't wanna begin again
Can't explain it, what I'm feelin', so I play pretend
I'ma be the same forever, watch it go again
This is how it end
Lately I've been sleepin' in
Shit is hard, so I don't wanna begin again
Can't explain it, what I'm feelin', so I play pretend
I'ma be the same forever, watch it go again
This is how it end
Now I been alone
Killin' every motherfuckin' hoe that's on my phone
Tryna drop 'em, being cold, but it's all a low
Get to know me, you be running, but I get it though
I'm unloveable, yeah
Been this way for a couple of days
That what I tell 'em, if I'm honest they be thinkin' that I'm strange
If I let 'em know it's years, stuck and on the same page
If I let 'em know it's tears, never sun only rain
I'm obsessin' on my last ones, thinkin' bout cuttin'
I'm thinkin' that I be nothin', I'm thinkin' 'bout poppin' somethin'
I'm thinkin' 'bout on the summit, I'm thinkin' 'bout I be jumpin'
I'm thinkin' 'bout all the people who watchin', all of 'em judgin'
I'm always thinking, never stops, up and down like it's stocks
And if you bettin' it's a loss, like you been gettin' robbed
I'm lookin' up at my idols, decided I'll never be one
Why am I such an outsider, just fuckin' give me a reason
Just fuckin' help me, these demons, they always eat me alive
And everytime that she leavin' she never told me goodbye
She left me scared of myself, don't think that she meant it well
I wish I told her how I'm feelin', that I'm goin' through hell, yeah
Wanna change, but this shit is too late
I wanna tell ya' that I love ya', but still you thinkin' I'm fake
But now I find myself runnin', just so I can get away
So I can go and be shut in and waste away all my days
Lately I've been sleepin' in
Shit is hard, so I don't wanna begin again
Can't explain it, what I'm feelin', so I play pretend
I'ma be the same forever, watch it go again
This is how it end
Now I been alone
Killin' every motherfuckin' hoe that's on my phone
Tryna drop 'em, being cold, but it's all a low
Get to know me, you be running, but I get it though
I'm unloveable, yeah
Wish I was different, but I keep on with this mask
Lotta' shit I should've said, but now I'm caught up on my past
I don't got a lot of friends, but I got a lotta' cash
I'm not thinkin' bout the end, I don't wanna get attached, damn
I'm disconnected - I don't got the time for me
Every day I learn a lesson 'bout the man that I should be
But I never can address it, even though it set me free
So I go down this direction and I'm droppin' what I need
Pick the pleasure every time and I'll admit it that I'm weak
You can measure me insid, and maybe then you'd really see
That I'm twisted and broken, this shit is hopeless for me
And while you pickin' up smokin' I'm tryin' hard just to breathe, yuh