Frank Zappa - Lonely Person Devices Lyrics

Has anybody ever seen Ms pinky?

(yeahhh, wow)

Hey, now you're gonna know what
I'm talking about we're
Gonna dedicate this whole song to Ms pinky
For those of you who don't know about Ms
Pinky: We recently visited that
Colorful country Finland
And were met at the airport by
A gentleman named Erik erik sees us
Every time we go to Finland
He's a very nice person
He collects autographs
And gives us presents and
When we left Finland, erik
Gave me a magazine to read on the airplane
It was one of his favorite books

Now a lot of people have heard
Quite a bit about Danish pornography
But have you ever heard of Finnish
Pornography? It's real different he
Gave me a Finnish pornographic magazine
That had some girls
In it that I couldn't even
Believe that they would take
Pictures of 'em there was one or two in
There that looked like Grace Slick but
The rest of 'em were hurtin'
Really hurtin' and of course the quality of
The color photography was just a
Little bit too far in the
Red direction, you know
They printed too much
Red and they were showing a lot
Of girls with red shoes
Big like this but when it
Got down to the business-like
Details of that interesting zone
Between the legs these
Hunks of meat hanging down from
The little bushes of
Hair all looked like they
Were horribly infected!

Anyway, thumbing through the magazine
There was an advertisement in
There for a product, it's
A lonely person product
And I know you have quite a few
Lonely person products here in Denmark:
There's so many shops that are dedicated to
The needs of the lonely German, the lonely
Italian, the lonely American and
The lonely Spanish
Person that drifts into your territory now
There are many lonely person
Products, you know, the most basic of all of
These is the vibrator and uh, it
It can be very useful and
Entertaining used properly but
When you start branching out to little things
Like Rover's Reamer has anybody
Ever seen Rover's Reamer?
It's a plastic dog dick about this long
With a crank in the end of it now
That is definitely a lonely person product
And Ms pinky is another one of
Those special lonely person products

Ms pinky is shorter than the average girl
Because she doesn't have a BODY
All she's got is a HEAD she's
Got a rubber head and
Her eyes are closed and her
Mouth is WIDE OPEN an
She's got her lips rolled back
Over her teeth so she
Doesn't hurt you very much and
She's washable so we're
Gonna dedicate this song to Ms pinky for
All the good work that she
Has done for everybody who sent away
For her in the Finnish magazine
And especially
For the guy in the back who has
Probably got Ms pinky sitting in
His lap right now, tucked away underneath
Of his overcoat, just down there
Having a good time